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Maybe she’s clumsy, but come on, how many doors can one person walk into?

If the stories of how she got them don’t ring true, watch out: She might start telling people you gave them to her. Crazy people like to dominate others, and if she knows you’re uncomfortable, she also knows you’ll say whatever it takes to get her to calm down. When things are good, you’re the king of the world and can accomplish anything you set your mind to. People who compliment themselves in this way are almost never being truthful.

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Deeply insecure people tend to take out their frustrations on those whose job it is to serve them.

Stay with her if you want, but you’ll need to do a lot of overtipping if you ever want to go to the same place twice.

I leave the girls alone in the main room of the sisterhood and return with my priced sex slave, with a mask covering his face and dragging him by his delicious, thick, meaty dick.

Her convictions will give her the moral authority to do, well… If you’ve gotten to the stage where you’d rather stay in than hit the town every night, that’s usually a good sign that the relationship is on firm ground.But if they’re part of the unique snowflake that makes her her, that’s a really bad sign.She loves you; she hates you; you’re the only one for her; maybe it’s not working out.But if her filters are down and you barely recognize her, there are probably other sides to her you haven’t seen as well.Whether you’re explaining, apologizing or asking for something, she repeats it back to you while adding her own ridiculous details and exaggerations. Unless one of your buddies has actually made a pass at her, she has no business telling you she doesn’t want you to hang out with him. Well, maybe, but you gotta draw the line somewhere.

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